Half Marathon Pains

For the last couple of years I’ve really started to enjoy running and attempt to go three times a week, although lately this seems to rarely happen. I used to go to the gym frequently but as I finished university and started having to earn a living and pay for my own bills etc, I sadly had to cut that out as an unnecessary expense. Thus running was a free way for me to continue exercising regularly and at times I can find it therapeutic and a good way to rid stress. Now, since getting into running, it has always been a goal of mine to do a half marathon and eventually a full one and last week I finally fulfilled the first half of this and ran the Scottish Half Marathon, my first and hopefully not my last marathon.

I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who would rather die than run for hours on end but I had my motivations. Mainly that being that growing up I’d never been into a sport or been good at one for a matter of fact and since I enjoyed running this was going to be my sport. That meant running marathons as I wanted to do it, to some degree, competitively. But me being me, I started of with every intention of training for the half, in fact to start I was running 10ks regularly and making sure I ran three times a week. But oh boy did that soon stop. It eventually got to the point where I was basically just doing one 5k run a week, meaning I was essentially attempting this half marathon with no training at all, not something I’d advise.

I expected that it was going to be hard, even with training it was going to be hard, so I assumed that it was going to be doubly as so since I hadn’t done any at all! I had put down my provisional time as 2 hours meaning I was in the first of the large pens on race day and I thought that this would be an achievable time for me, since I can comfortably do 11k in just under an hour. I then believed that for the first 15k I’d be fine then the next couple would be hard with the final few being fine again as I’d be close to the finish and motivated. But this definitely wasn’t the case, instead there was a wall around mile 10 where my legs became really heavy and I was finding it very hard to run, to the point where I had to stop, walk for a bit and then run again for a while and I did this on repeat until the end.

It’s strange, what I didn’t account for while running a half marathon is where my mind would wander too. I must of thought about everything during that 2 hours running, from what I was going to do for dinner, to who I thought during the run was attractive (this happened quite a bit). But what I did come to realise is that running for this length of time definitely becomes a mental battle, as during those last 3 miles I had a constant argument going on in my head on if I should stop and walk or continue running.

Now its nearly been a week since I ran and I can finally walk again properly, and since then reflecting back I’ve realised that there are some things that i’d have done differently and will do different for my next one, whenever that shall be. Firstly make sure to train, this one is pretty obvious really and I think it would of helped with those final 3 miles I struggled with. Secondly, skip the running energy gel, I had never used it in the past and it ended up giving me a horrible stitch which I think it was another thing which contributed to those hard final miles. Thirdly, work on my running playlist more, it’s strange how motivational some songs are and I’d easily overlooked this and finally remember that during the run at times it may feel like hell and be extremely hard, but within an hour or so you’ll be finished. The pain is just temporary and worth the reward when finished.

Well that is all I’ve got to say on this matter. As always I hope you’ve enjoyed these rambles. Until next time.


– J

Breakups Suck

Well as I said in my first post, i’m going through a breakup currently and one way I’ve found to get over something like this is to talk about it, which is what this is. Now I’ve been broken up with before but this is the first time that its happened for me when its being a loving serious relationship that lasted a long amount of time, for me anyway, so it’s an adjustment. As to be expected, I hate breakups for so many reasons. I hate how one minute you can be great and the next minute angry and then upset, I hate how they initially make you feel so alone, I hate the change that comes with them, I hate how you have to go from having somebody in your life who is always there for you and wants to talk to not. But I know that these will get better over time, that’s the sucky part though, that you have to get through this bad period first. I mean this is all obvious stuff that I already knew beforehand, its just weird to be going through it.

Another hard thing is that stuff like this messes with your emotions and your head. I don’t know what to think one minute from the next and then to have friends telling you various things, from completely cutting them out your life as they don’t reserve you, to trying to be friends with them as its a shame to let something like that go to waste. Its hard and I flick through these one second to the next. To cut someone completely out though, that you cared for and still care for, is extremely hard and something I don’t think I’d ever want to do.

Right now as I’m writing this, I’m listening to ‘ Santa Tell Me’ by Ariana Grande on loop and things are good, in fact the last couple of days have been pretty alright. I’m doing the typical thing post breakup and am concentrating on myself; I’ve started this blog, I want to get back into my art (a pastime of mine) and I want to get back into running regularly. I’m also going to try being friends with my ex, I know everyone always says that, but I really do. It might not work, it might do, I don’t know but right now that’s what I want. I don’t want to just remove someone who’s had a huge impact on my life.

Anyway, these are my ramblings on the matter. It’s a weird time but things will only get better.


– J


Well I don’t really know what to write with this being my first blog post, other than what I hope to achieve from this so lets begin there. Basically for me this is going to be a diary of sorts where I talk about stuff that swims through my mind constantly allowing me to get it out of my system. I’ve always found talking about things to other people, be it be problems or issues i’m having, the best way for me to cope and deal with them. So that is what this is, a sort of therapeutic way to just stuff that might be bothering me, or on the other end of the spectrum, be something I’ve enjoyed and am passionate about. I might not even keep at this, which is where the name comes from, or it might evolve into something else but only time shall tell. Topics of conversation may range depending on whats going on in my life, from breakup stuff (this will be the next post as surprise surprise I’m going through one currently, and am using this as a way to deal with it. Yano the drill, try and love yourself yadda yadda yadda) to stuff around my hobbies and interests. ┬áBut because of this and the nature of the topics I’ll be talking about, I will be keeping this anonymous so all you need to know right now is that i’m a 20 something guy living in Edinburgh, so enjoy these inconsistent rambles.


– J