MMORPG Burnout

People who know me might not realise that I’m actually a huge computer game player, particularly MMORPG’s and have literally played nearly every different one under the sun. Ok that might be an exaggeration, but I have played a lot of different ones and genres. One problem that I seem to encounter with every one I play though is burnout, that feeling where you just can’t be bothered to log in anymore and sadly a game you found addictively enjoyable just doesn’t interest you. My problem is that when playing an MMORPG, I want to invest all my time in it and have it as my sort of ‘home game’ – a game that I constantly play, always enjoy and to some minor level invest in it like you would a job or career. Now people might think this too much but if I’m investing my time into something, even has a hobby, I want it to be worthwhile.

Just to put into perspective of how many different MMORPG’s i’ve played and got burnt out on, here is a list:

  • World of Warcraft
  • Final Fantasy XIV
  • Rift
  • Everquest 2
  • Aion
  • Allods Online
  • Warhammer Online
  • Star Wars The Old Republic
  • The Secret World
  • Wildstar
  • Star Trek Online
  • Champions Online
  • Neverwinter
  • Guild Wars
  • Guild Wars 2
  • The Elder Scrolls Online
  • City of Heroes
  • Runescape

World of Warcraft has always been my main MMORPG though and having played it on and off since vanilla I think it’ll always be one of those ones that even after I’m burnout, I’ll always pick it back up again at a later stage. With the launch of BFA on the horizon and the release of the first four Allied Races, it’s given me plenty to do on the game and I seem to be deep into one of those periods where I’m thoroughly enjoying it and play regularly. Other than this I’m really excited for the early access launch of Bless Online so once that’s out I’ll definitely be jumping into that and seeing if it lives up to the hype and hopefully if so, it might become like WoW as one of the main MMORPG’s I play.



– J


New Year, Trying To Be A Better Me

Well, last year for me was a-lot. There is no other way to put it really. Don’t get me wrong there were several high points during the year; graduating from my masters, starting a adult job, going on holiday, just to name a couple. But for the most part the lows seemed to out weigh these, especially towards the end of the year, so I for one am glad that we’ve seen the back of 2017 and are well on the way to a good 2018. (Cryptic opening paragraph there because I won’t be going into anymore detail on why it was so crap, ok?!)

Now I know that the new year started over a month ago but I wanted to talk about my new years resolutions in a self indulgent, I’m trying to grow sorta way. Every year I make the same ones, to exercise, eat healthy, yadda yadda. You know, all those cliche ones, and do I ever stick to them? No! Well this year is going to be different and I’ve stuck to them pretty well for one month in. Essentially, in light of frankly crap year I had, I’ve done a Kylie Jenner and had a year of realising things and now I’m trying to be more self reflective and mentally healthy. So this year I whittled it down to the following and to be honest they are still cliche but they’re achievable:

  • Manage money better/save more – This one speaks for it’s self. Last year I started my first full time adult job and moved into a flat in which for the first time wasn’t student accommodation, although it still feels like it sometimes. Because of this and the fact my job doesn’t pay the best I’ve had to be more strict with my spending, so in light of this I’ve tried to save what I can each month and set up separate bank accounts for bills, savings and spending (something I’d suggest you do as it makes the whole thing so much easier to manage). My main motivation for this resolution though being that now I’m a full time adult I need to pay for my own holidays and I really want to go on holiday.
  • Stick to learning French daily – Something I’ve came to realise throughout university and from living in a large multicultural city is that nearly everyone can speak another language and I’m hindering myself by not being able to do something which so many others do with ease. So in a bid to fix this I’ve stuck to my duolingo lessons and plan on trying to read and watch more in french. You maybe thinking why french? Well for me its because I find it the easiest as a lot of the words are very similar to english. Coupled with this I’d like to one day emigrate to Canada so knowing french will greatly aid me in this when it comes to finding a job and visa applications.
  • Exercise regularly – Cliche alert! Ok, ok this one maybe something I try to do every year and I do exercise quite often anyway as I enjoy it but I find that sometimes I can easily go weeks without doing so as well. Thus I’ve tasked myself with doing some form of exercise, including long walks, at least 4 to 5 times a week. I find exercise both beneficial for my mental health as much as my physical and by signing up to classes as the gym (spin and kettlebell being my favourites) I’m actually motivated to exercise and stick to it regularly!
  • Do more for my own well-being (Don’t be a fuckboi, eat what I like, hobbies etc) – As I’ve said last year was a bit of a rough one and part of that was because I let my happiness be dictated by people, well one person in particular, and not myself. This meant I was unhappy quite a lot and lost a sense of myself in a bid to try and please said person. But since i’ve realised this I want to be selfish and do more for me, including eating what I want. If I’m exercising regularly I can afford to eat what the hell I like without the worry of putting on weight (still I eat what I want in moderation though, as you should do). Another part of this is that I struggle some times sticking to the hobbies I enjoy when spending the most of my time with people, so this year I’m making the active effort to stick to my hobbies, art and playing video-games, also meaning I’ll be blogging about them both too.

We’ll see if I stick to these as well as I have done but I hope I do. I think the thing with new years resolutions is that they have to be achievable and in some form not for wholly selfish reasons. I also think when its things that will benefit you and something you want to stick to as a process of self-improvement you’re more likely to do so. I hope you’ve enjoyed my ramblings on this topic, even if not, I’ve enjoyed writing about it which is the whole purpose of this blog!

Until next time.

– J


Half Marathon Pains

For the last couple of years I’ve really started to enjoy running and attempt to go three times a week, although lately this seems to rarely happen. I used to go to the gym frequently but as I finished university and started having to earn a living and pay for my own bills etc, I sadly had to cut that out as an unnecessary expense. Thus running was a free way for me to continue exercising regularly and at times I can find it therapeutic and a good way to rid stress. Now, since getting into running, it has always been a goal of mine to do a half marathon and eventually a full one and last week I finally fulfilled the first half of this and ran the Scottish Half Marathon, my first and hopefully not my last marathon.

I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who would rather die than run for hours on end but I had my motivations. Mainly that being that growing up I’d never been into a sport or been good at one for a matter of fact and since I enjoyed running this was going to be my sport. That meant running marathons as I wanted to do it, to some degree, competitively. But me being me, I started of with every intention of training for the half, in fact to start I was running 10ks regularly and making sure I ran three times a week. But oh boy did that soon stop. It eventually got to the point where I was basically just doing one 5k run a week, meaning I was essentially attempting this half marathon with no training at all, not something I’d advise.

I expected that it was going to be hard, even with training it was going to be hard, so I assumed that it was going to be doubly as so since I hadn’t done any at all! I had put down my provisional time as 2 hours meaning I was in the first of the large pens on race day and I thought that this would be an achievable time for me, since I can comfortably do 11k in just under an hour. I then believed that for the first 15k I’d be fine then the next couple would be hard with the final few being fine again as I’d be close to the finish and motivated. But this definitely wasn’t the case, instead there was a wall around mile 10 where my legs became really heavy and I was finding it very hard to run, to the point where I had to stop, walk for a bit and then run again for a while and I did this on repeat until the end.

It’s strange, what I didn’t account for while running a half marathon is where my mind would wander too. I must of thought about everything during that 2 hours running, from what I was going to do for dinner, to who I thought during the run was attractive (this happened quite a bit). But what I did come to realise is that running for this length of time definitely becomes a mental battle, as during those last 3 miles I had a constant argument going on in my head on if I should stop and walk or continue running.

Now its nearly been a week since I ran and I can finally walk again properly, and since then reflecting back I’ve realised that there are some things that i’d have done differently and will do different for my next one, whenever that shall be. Firstly make sure to train, this one is pretty obvious really and I think it would of helped with those final 3 miles I struggled with. Secondly, skip the running energy gel, I had never used it in the past and it ended up giving me a horrible stitch which I think it was another thing which contributed to those hard final miles. Thirdly, work on my running playlist more, it’s strange how motivational some songs are and I’d easily overlooked this and finally remember that during the run at times it may feel like hell and be extremely hard, but within an hour or so you’ll be finished. The pain is just temporary and worth the reward when finished.

Well that is all I’ve got to say on this matter. As always I hope you’ve enjoyed these rambles. Until next time.


– J


Well I don’t really know what to write with this being my first blog post, other than what I hope to achieve from this so lets begin there. Basically for me this is going to be a diary of sorts where I talk about stuff that swims through my mind constantly allowing me to get it out of my system. I’ve always found talking about things to other people, be it be problems or issues i’m having, the best way for me to cope and deal with them. So that is what this is, a sort of therapeutic way to just stuff that might be bothering me, or on the other end of the spectrum, be something I’ve enjoyed and am passionate about. I might not even keep at this, which is where the name comes from, or it might evolve into something else but only time shall tell. Topics of conversation may range depending on whats going on in my life, from dating to stuff around my hobbies and interests. ┬áBut because of this and the nature of the topics I’ll be talking about, I will be keeping this anonymous so all you need to know right now is that i’m a 20 something guy living in Edinburgh, so enjoy these inconsistent rambles.


– J